Normal Baby Stuff

What a great weekend. It's so lovely to have a "normal" baby! She's got smiles for everyone, she bounces when she's excited and she's enjoying her adventures in solid foods. Last night when I pulled her out of the tub I anticipated a freak out, so I quickly improvised a silly game. I buried her in a stack of towels and repeated "bundle bundle bundle!" and her mouth opened really wide and her eyes looked all crazy. My heart sank and I pulled off the towels to see what was going on, and she was vibrating she was giggling so hard! I thought something was wrong! I have never seen this happy baby before. I feel like we need a proper introduction. So, hello happy baby Eleanor, nice to meet you. My name is Kate and I was mother to a very unhappy baby for 6 months. Her name was Eleanor too, but she wasn't like you at all. She had sad eyes and a swollen body and was in a lot of pain. She was a brave, strong girl and we loved her very much. That said, we are very happy to replace her with you! It's impossible to think I could love anything more than you, happy baby Eleanor. I am very pleased to be your Mummy.

:-D

Her counts are way up so she will be starting chemo this afternoon. She's 6 days off her protocol, which isn't too shabby, and she is repeating the same dose as last time. This means we can expect the same results as last time, which is (for lack of a better word) nice. No surprises this time.

It's kind of crazy that we have been here a month and a half and she is just starting her second of eight rounds of chemo. This treatment is going to take a long time. Right now it feels like we are fighting an invisible foe. The tumor is gone so we are battling the microscopic stuff and those shadows in her lungs. I have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that those residual cells could divide and conquer other parts of her. It just takes one cranky cancerous cell to ruin a perfectly good organ. Cancer stinks. She is due for a CT scan after this round, which will tell us how she is responding and if those shadows are still there. Anyway I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's just get through today and worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes. Today is for drooly laughing babies and to all those people who told me "not to worry - it gets better", I finally know what you are talking about! Babies CAN be fun!