I Want Security

Eleanor has a new security blanket. It's my forearm. No other part of my arm will do. No one else's arm will do. She will not sleep without it.

I'm fortunate in the fact that her hospital crib puts her at waist level, so I am not forced to fold my body in half whilst allowing her to snuggle with said arm. It's still not that comfortable. I usually end up leaning over her for a good 15 minutes while she slowly nods off. She likes to absentmindedly stroke my arm with her right hand while pulling it closer with her left. She smacks her lips and rubs her tongue over her gums (and lone tooth*) the whole time. I know she is asleep when the smacking stops. It is only then that I can begin my escape, and I ultimately go too quickly and she wakes up. We usually end up repeating the whole process two or three times.

I suspect it is a behaviour that has developed from the fact her nursing came to an abrupt stop. She probably still craves some skin-to-skin contact and has come up with this as an acceptable substitute. I have to say that I am also finding weird ways to be close (see previous post re: lying in her crib). I miss having that cuddle time too, but this arm-fetish is bizarre. I know when she is tired because she will contort herself in my arms to find my skin, and then her little hands just stroke away. It's almost like she is trying to put me to sleep - There, there, Mummy. Shhhh...

I sometimes feel like my heart is going to burst I love her so much.

*Great shot of her lone tooth

My little jack o' lantern